Monday, June 25, 2012
It would be nice to take say that today is p-day and I get to relax -
especially after this last week -- but that's not the case, nor does it need to be. This week was full of supervising an elder who desired nothing more than to go home, spending a full day driving him to Manchester and coming back with another missionary, visiting Eastern Maine Medical Center nearly every day to give blessings to the sister missionaries and other members fighting illnesses, dealing with investigators who will not make the choices necessary to progress and find more happiness, being dropped, struggling with flaky members, and a whole lot of lessons learned - one in particular that I know I was prepared to learn from last week's trials. So ya, it's been a good week, and I'm just glad to be doing this work.
I've been so blessed to have the opportunity to give of myself this last week. Often times I feel like I lack skills and have nothing but a smile, so I give that away as well. I've found joy in simply
searching to relieve someone else's burden, striving to fulfill my priesthood duty, and seeking revelation as to how I can make someone else's life better than it was before I came in. Throughout this last week, I have learned many things about the gospel - most especially about the Atonement of Jesus Christ, and it has fueled my desire to share His Gospel more.
Last night, after an investigator dropped us, with my heart in despire I allowed doubtful feelings to enter in. Amidst my frustrations and questions, I asked, "Why is this so difficult? why is it so hard for people to see the truth and grasp it when we put it right in front of their eyes? If this Gospel really is true, then why doesn't everyone just accept our message and commitments?" My companion, Elder Craig, simply said, "You wanna know the answer? this is why," and he popped in a cd that had excerpts from talks from President Eyring and Elder Holland. As I listened, I learned a principle from each one.
I learned that when we are stretched and pulled, fatigued and sore, worn out and simply desire to rest, we must make this rallying cry, "REMEMBER HIM!" and remember our Savior, the One who was stretched beyond comprehension, but never gave in and never rested until his task was finished. He completed the Atonement, and in order for us to understand the Atonement more fully, we must also go through some form of what He went through for us. I learned that Salvation is not a cheap experience - there was an infinite price paid for us, to which we are eternally indebted.
So why is this work not easier? Because neither I, nor my investigators, would deserve the blessings promised - on which you could not place a price tag. And I'm happy to say that as my understanding of the Atonement has increased, my desire to share The Restored Gospel of Jesus Christ has increased as well, and I look forward to every short minute I'll have this week to do so. :)
From Maine with Love,
Elder Dustin Carr